Mocking the World since 2003

Tuesday, April 06, 2004

Addiction is Not a River in Egypt 

Ronald Harwood, author of The Pianist screenplay and award winning playwright, has backed out of directing a play in Winnipeg. Why, you ask? Winnipeg has a city-wide ban on smoking in public places. To explain his choice, he said "I had no intention of allowing myself to be forced out into the street in winter to partake of one of my great pleasures."

You stand up for your great pleasures, Ronald! A few years ago I was offered a career advancing opportunity in London. However London has banned kitty-strangling, a great pleasure of mine, and so I said "No! I will not give up my great pleasure!" On further reflection, however, I realized that strangling kittens was a very pathetic thing to base my life around, the screeches of the dying kittens were upsetting those around me, and my arms were beginning to bleed from all the scratches. Thus I gave up kitty-strangling and I pursued the career-advancing opportunity in London. It's true that occasionally I will sneak into an alley and strangle another kitty, but I no longer let it run my life. But you stick by your principles, Ronald!

Director pulls out over smoking ban [Ananova]

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